Adylaed

Now, you may think you don’t need a lactation consultant if the breastfeeding itself is going fine. This was my third time at it--my milk was flowing like never before, and Sophie’s latch was spot-on (except at bedtime when she decided to frantically open and close her mouth while I was trying to get her on. You know that carnival game where you had to get the ball into the fish’s mouths before they closed? Like that. It's not as fun with your nipple.) Feeding was generally going well, and she had the pounds to show it.

But there’s a lot more to breastfeeding than the actual feeding.

Did you know, for example, that drinking a ton more water isn’t enough, you also need electrolytes? And that vitamin D helps ward of post-partem depression? And that vitamin K helps the vitamin D absorb?

My doctor and the lactation consultant took one look at the chaos and my quiz, then these two women sat down with me and explained a lot of things.

The information I learned that morning, I learned for the first time. As I mentioned earlier, this was baby number three. (Our four-year-old was at preschool during all this.) How was this possible? I am an inquisitive person. I taught high school for eleven years. It wasn’t like I hadn’t been researching this stuff. How do I get my baby to latch better? How do I unclog my milk ducts? But I didn’t know what questions to ask until problems came up...or even what questions to ask to address them.

Which is strange, because you have, what, fifteen pre-natal appointments per child? But those appointments are solely focused on the baby’s and mother’s health at the time. There is never any looking ahead. Yes, you can take childbirth and newborn care classes, but I didn’t have time for that. As it was I was scheduling my pre-natal appointments with whichever doctor happened to be available at 3pm on my way to the train from work. Any earlier and I would miss work, any later and I would be late for the nanny for the other two kids.

I didn’t know there was all this helpful information out there that I wasn’t aware of. I just thought the whole thing was a beautiful but tiring struggle women have been going through since the beginning of time and that was that.

So…you have all these pre-natal appointments listening to baby’s heartbeat and talking about how you feel and then, boom, you give birth, and the next time you talk to a professional besides the baby’s pediatrician is six weeks later (if you don’t miss your appointment).

That is a LONG time.

If breastfeeding is difficult, or you’re not feeling like yourself, that is a long time to also be taking care of a tiny human being who literally depends on you to survive.

Why is the information not streamlined? And since, as I mentioned earlier, women have been going through this since the beginning of time, shouldn’t we have certain things down by now? Why was I just finding out on baby number three, for example, that you shouldn’t give the baby a binkie right after birth if you plan to breastfeed? (More on this later…)

It turns out there is a ton of information that does make it easier. But it’s up to the mother to  find it. Well, that's flawed - you don't know what you don't know, right? Many of us new mothers don’t live near family we could turn to for help, and even if we did, most of our own mothers did formula.

Before our current swing back into breastfeeding, there was a long stretch of time when hospitals were pushing baby formula. In fact, Massachusetts (where I’m writing this from here in my kitchen while Sophie is supposed to be napping but banging on the baby gate upstairs) was one of the first states to do away with the formula company-sponsored goody bags that were given to new mothers before they left the hospital [https://massbreastfeeding.org/ban-the-bags/].

Doing away with that is good. Now we need to fill the gap.

This blog contains a blend of articles I’ve read, concrete breastfeeding tips I learned from lactation consultants and hospitals, and books I’ve devoured. (Usually while nursing…a nice benefit—you have one hand free!)

I'm guessing many of you out there who want to breastfeed are also against a lot of the mainstream shennanigans that are being launched at mothers right now. It seems like being a parent means filling your house with noisy flashing toys, signing your kid up for a million different activities, buying them iPads, and buying separate "kid food" for them, because they apparently can't eat normal human food.

No, thank you.

I think (and hope) there are more of us out there who are equally freaked out.

If all goes as planned and I manage to get all my ducks in a row while managing the three real little ducks at home, Adylaed will also be a place where you can find some important goodies that I wish had beginning with my first baby.

And of course, this blog also contains what I’ve learned from my own trials and errors.

There were a lot.

- Jessica

IT TAKES A VILLAGE! I'd love to hear what you think or what you have experienced, and I'm sure other readers would too. Please leave a comment below!